For Laura

What a smile she had. It said "I care for you."
She never spoke aloud but only murmured to me alone.
The whispers swam through me,
Flew in me and kissed my dreams
Under the quilts
Even though I never slept around her.
Why would I? It would only waste time,
Time we could be loving in.
Whether we kissed, spoke, or were intertwined,
It was all love to me.
There was romance with none.
No star gazing or dining by lakes,
Only cloudy days in dreary parks
And rides on the bus
To her house at the edge of town.
And the stairs to the top
Of a car park open to the air
And overlooking right to the city limits.
After school was a regular time.
The uniform was 'ugly' she said,
I never noticed until I saw it on the floor
But even then it didn't matter.
The blue matched her eyes
And the crest was an excuse to look.
It wasn't about sex and sleaze,
The sweat was not the point.
The form was enough
And the warmth was a bonus.
The act was an expression
And we waited until it was right.
Her arms would wrap around my neck
And mine would wrap around her waist
And we would stare and just
Share the moment.
When we watched films
She would lean her head on my shoulder
And then mine on hers.
When I was sick I would lay mine
On her lap and she would stroke my hair.
I would pretend to sleep
Because I could never bring myself to.
I don't know why.
She never wore lipstick
Unless we were going to a party.
Her lips were perfect without and soft to touch
So I would when she let me but only then.
When we lay on the couch she would on me
Belly to belly. She was shorter and fitted just right.
She always said I was warm.
I always said it was my love reaching her.
That would make her smile.
We slept at night in her single bed
In the softest rose patterned covers,
I have yet to feel softer
As we curled together.

I don't miss it, but I do appreciate it.